Games 22 & 23: This Is Really Starting To Suck...

Toronto blows...if they dont want to try and play then I don't want to try and write about them...fuck em.

Game 22: It's So Nice To See Our Draft Picks Playing So Well...

Tuukka Rask made his NHL debut last night at the Air Canada Center. Rask was drafted by the Leafs in 2005 and looked very promising for them...That was until he was traded to the bruins for Raycroft. Rask played in and won his first NHL game against Toronto Last night 4-2...is this ever depressing...

The Leafs were about 39 minutes into the game with a 2-0 lead (both goals were shit) but managed to lose in the last 21 minutes...The goodness all started with guess who?...McCabe firing a clearing attempt right into the shin pads of Kobasew who threw it out to Kessel and put it past Toskala to open the flood gates. Here is the video of said brain fart by Bryan

From: www.mccabesucks.com

I played hockey for most of my childhood and into my late teens. I played rep hockey and I was a defence man. One thing that I was taught (probably when I was about 6 or so) was this...Never try and clear it up the middle...the boards are your best friend. I just don't get how McCabe can continuously fuck up...it baffles me...
He needs to waive his no trade clause and get out of here before people start playing with his break cables...This guy is poison. I can complain about Bryan till I'm blue in the face but it wont do any good...I guess all we can do is hope for another groin injury that will take him out of the lineup for an extended period of time.

Anyways, after that gift goal the Bruins came out in the third and put 3 more in to seal the game...and yet again we see a team on Saturday that dominates the Sens then comes back last night and gives up 2 points to the Bruins...I wish TSN still had that "Pepto Bismol upset of the week" segment..Bryan McCabe would be the poster boy for that bitch and would be on for 52 weeks straight (I'm sure he'd find a way to cock slap leaf fans in the off season too)...

Some good news to come out of the game last night...Sundin scored number 399 as a leaf and also passed Mahovolich for sole possession of number 27 on the all time scoring list...Way to eat the clam chowder Mats!

So this weekend Toronto are off to Dallas and Phoenix (Friday and Saturday)...Dallas is doing just as well at the leafs this year and Phoenix is one of only 8 teams with a worse record than the leafs...I truly hope that Toronto will be coming out of this weekend 2-0...It's highly possible with their strong(er) play on the road then at home...by the way, that 4 game week is done as of last night and I predicted a 1-3 record...they went 1-2-1...I win...not like that makes it any better...See ya'll after the Stars game Friday.

Game 21: Toronto Beat Who?! (Ottawa In Case You Missed It)

Saturday night I found myself at the Christmas potluck for my in-laws extended family (about 75 people)...Somewhere between the half frozen PC shrimp ring and the home made meatballs the Leafs game was on and they we're looking for another embarrassing loss to the Senators only something really weird happened...They won.

I was watching the game on a huge TV that had the reception of an old coat hanger antenna and for 2.5 hours of the night I was in a happy place.

This is reason #4320 why the leafs piss me off...They beat Ottawa. No, they shut out Ottawa... The first time Ottawa has been shut out since last December. The last 19 match ups leading up to Saturdays game Ottawa was 15-2-2 against the Leafs...Does this mean Toronto is just as good as Ottawa? No way...Does Ottawa have an excuse for losing? nope...Did Toronto deserve to win? You bet...Toronto can play 60 minutes of near flawless hockey against the best team in the league and win 3-0 then Tuesday they'll play Boston and probably lose 5-3. I just don't get how inconsistent the Leafs are this year. No one can really explain why...It just happens...and it blows big time.

A few reason why I think Toronto won:

1) First and foremost...Wozniewski was only on the ice for 7 minutes (2nd lowest TOI for Toronto on Saturday next to Pohl)

2) Toronto converted on 2 power play opportunities in one game (first time all season I think)

3) I don't go back on stats often (I go by memory) but I think this may be only the second time they didn't allow a power play goal in a game...(the first being a Raycroft shutout earlier)

4) Maybe Ottawa came in thinking (assuming) it was going to be an easy win...

5) We had a goalie in net that could make a big save when the Leafs needed it.

I find that a goalie getting a shutout is a lot like a pitcher getting a no-hitter (even though a no-hitter is much harder to do) There are a few things that need to happen...The defence must be solid. The Goalie/Pitcher has to be on top of his game and the defence (goalie for hockey/fielders for baseball) have to make 3 huge plays during the game. Toskala did that making a few giant saves and holding the fort while the leafs were actually skating with Ottawa instead of watching them like they did in the previous 3 games this year.

So before this 4 game week started I was predicting a 2-2 (optimistically) and 1-3 (realistically) record after the game in Boston tomorrow night...Right now they're 1-1-1 so things are looking decent for the time being...I'm really hoping that the win on Saturday can add somesort of morale boost in the Leafs dressing room because as this season grows, it's not gonna get any easier for them.

See everyone Wednesday morning...peace

Game 20: Here's What I Think About The Leafs Game Last Night In Boston...

So I just spent the entire morning in sensitivity training so pardon me if my post is not up to its standard.

I feel as though the Leafs played poorly last night against the Bruins. Raycroft was not as strong as he has been in previous games and it would be nice to see Toronto play well on Saturday against the Senators. I hope they do...that would be swell...Other than that I can not really say anything else regarding last nights match up...I feel that if I do I might be offending someone so it's best to be quiet.

Anyone seen my balls? I seem to have lost them...

Homo Alert!...Way To Be Discrete Jiri Tlusty...

Well with the Leafs absolutely shitting the bed this year most fans have seen this team go from bad to worse...That was the good news for Tlusty...Here's the bad...

Jiri Tlusty has been caught with his pants down and the naked images of him leave little to the imagination.

Tlusty, the Leafs rookie is suddenly the centre of hockey attention after naked photos appeared on the Canadian gossip website isthishappening.com. The photos were actually shot by Tlusty on his camera phone, according to his lawyer.

Leafs GM John Ferguson added: "He made a naive mistake as a teenager. It's a lesson in how something private can easily become very public in the Internet age."

My Favourite is Paul Maurice's comments about the situation...

"(Jiri's) handled it as well as anyone could handle it under the circumstances," said Paul Maurice..."It's an excellent learning experience for a young man."

I can see Jiri sitting in his hotel room cowering in the corner being pet on his head by McCabe right now....handle it under the circumstances?...how else can he handle it?...I cant wait till July when the "Gay Pride Parade" is in town and Tlusty is at the top of the float in his thong with a huge Super Soaker squirting everyone...ohh man...never a dull moment in Leafs nation...

read the full story at http://www.torontosun.com/

I also like how this probably (not) would have blown over if the leafs had of just let it play it's course but noooo...Ferguson decides to have a press release so everyone and their fucking aunt knows about it...this is funny...I feel bad for the kid (not really) but only in Toronto would we get this kind of stuff...(and probably Ottawa since there are a dozen or so homo's on the Senators team)...but that's another story...

Game 19: McCabe Out Shines Himself Once Again...

Last night the Canadiens were in Toronto for "Tuesday Night In Toronto" doesn't really have the same ring as "HNIC" but whatever...

It was a very exciting game. It was both ways the whole game with a lot of speed and lots of good chances...both goalies played great (not much of a surprise for Price) and despite a very hard fought battle for 60 minutes the Leafs only had to look as far as #24 to give Montreal the extra point and the win in overtime.

The rest of the Leafs blue line core desperately need to learn CPR because Bryan McCabe keeps choking so much he's killing the Leafs.

I'm pretty busy at work today so I can't really get into detail about the game...here are a few cliff notes...

1) Wellwood Scored goal #1 and #2 in the second period last night..His 4th game back since the surgery
2) Mark Bell picked up his first point as a leaf (assist) in his 4th game back (since he got suspended for getting shit faced and wrecking his car)
3) Raycroft was really good for once and got the short end of the stick (in the bum) for his efforts
4) Price was wicked and looks promising...
5) Ferguson is a douche (not really related to the game but I felt it needed to be said again)

Here is a Lovely montage to "McKlutz" (as the media calls him) showing why he's worth every penny...



So Toronto are up against Boston on Thursday...let's keep our fingers crossed that McCabe pulls his groin again in practice before then...0-0-1 so far in this crucial 4 game stretch...until Thursday...go to youtube and look up "Lady Punch" it will make you feel better about the O.T. loss.

Avery To Blake: HaHa You Have Cancer...Or Something Like That...

For Those of you who have not yet heard about the battle between Sean Avery and Darcy Tucker during the pre-game skate on Saturday night let me throw a few notes at you...

Yesterday Howard Berger of the Fan 590 reported that a player in the Rangers' dressing room told him Avery incited the initial jawing session when he directed a comment at Blake about his medical condition...For those of you under a rock Jason Blake has a (treatable) form of cancer known as chronic myelogenous leukemia.

Berger reported Avery's teammate wanted to "strangle" the pesky winger once he heard what was said. Neither Blake nor Tucker would comment on the words that were exchanged on the ice.

NHL disciplinarian Colin Campbell has ordered Avery to meet with him this week to explain himself

For once Darcy Tucker actually looks like the classy one..."I'm not going to get into what was said and what was not said. This is out of our hands now and we'll stay out of it," said Tucker.

During this time Avery has been unavailable for comment...So after 72 hours I'm jumping back off the wagon...Avery is a total fucking douche...It's unbelievable that some one even that juvenile would go as low as making fun of a guy for having cancer...FUCKIN' CANCER!...unreal...

Hopefully the league will punish Avery for this mess and he grows a pair of stones and apologizes to Blake...It's just so hard to wrap my head around the fact that a grown man could be so mentally retarded as to say something like that to a person who is ill...whatever...

Check out the full story here...Canada.com

And here is the video of the Pregame fight for those of you who have not seen it...

Games 17 & 18: 2 Games In 2 Nights Starting To Catch Up To The Leafs...

Friday night Toronto was at home away from home against Buffalo at the HSBC arena (which for those of you who don't know is about a dong's length from the border). The arena was more than half full with Leafs fans and it was rockin'...I missed the first period because of my commute but I did listen to it on the radio...It sounded like Toronto was getting out played pretty bad and I found myself to not be in a hurry to get home and watch anymore...When I did turn on the t.v. I was pleasantly surprised with Toronto's play. They had great defensive end coverage and were containing Buffalo's speed to the outside for the final two periods. Raycroft looked great (for once) and managed to get the shutout (6th of his career if I heard correctly)...isn't there a guy in Columbus right now who already has 5 this year alone?...I digress...The boys looked great and managed to capitalize on a struggling Sabres team...thank god...

So with Raycroft doing amazingly well on Friday it would make sense to start him on Saturday vs. the red hot Rangers right?...well that's why you're not a millionaire GM...stupid...apparently it makes more sense to start the guy who got pulled in his last two starts vs. the guy who got a shutout the night before...I guess we're all the retarded ones and JFJ is the genius...

Really nice remembrance day/HHOF ceremony before the game...just though I'd throw that in...

The game was pretty exciting...although it was difficult to watch...I'm not sure if it was because of the wet burps induced by my butter chicken dinner or the fatigue that the Leafs were showing but it was awkward to watch...One thing that I noticed on Saturday that really pisses me off about the Leafs...(it's actually reason #4,302) is how they give up their own blue line when the other team is trying to enter...it's so frustrating to watch it drives me nuts...Next time you watch a Leafs game watch how the opposite team lines up on their blue line when the Leafs are trying to enter (usually 3 on the line with a 4th right behind them) the Leafs have no chance of breaking this wall and are always forced to dump and chase...then look at when the opposing team is trying to come into the leafs zone. the Leafs just allow them to waltz right in (much like Paris' vag) and set up shop for their offensive possession...Just baffels me that with the amount of problems they have in their zone they would try and correct something like letting the other team in their zone in the first place...whatever...

Avery was a pest...like he always is...he's good at it...do I hate him? you bet. Would I want him on my team? In a second...you see Avery is the kind of guy that Tucker wishes he was...and blake too if he wasnt so much like Wendell Borton ...Avery got in the face of Leafs players early and often and was also a bastard on the scoresheet setting up Shanny for the first goal and scoring the second himself (span of :45 seconds in the 2nd)...

The Leafs looked tired and New York was skating circles around them (mostly Jagr)...this guy has mad speed...and he's strong on the puck...Pony scored 2 twice late in the second to tie it at 2-2 but New York ended up winning in the shootout...so Toronto got 3 of 4 points this weekend...not bad but could be better...ohh wait it is better...Because Kubina is out with a bummed knee...whheeeeeeee!

So tomorrow (Tuesday) the Canadiens are in Toronto to face the Leafs and then the Buds are off to Boston for one before hosting the Sens again...where they will probably get embarassed again...then host the Bruins next Tuesday. These next 4 games could really help (or potentially destroy) the Leafs...It will be very interesting to see which team shows up to play...Wishful thinking would have the Leafs comming out of this 2-2 but it think it might be more like 1-3...we'll see...

Week 4 Pylon Goes To The Head Richard...

Or Dickhead if you didn't catch that play on words...So the votes are in and week 4 winner is Richard "Dick" Peddie the head of Maple Leafs Sports & Entertainment...

Not much of a surprise that the fans would pick the guy at the top of the food chain seeing as how all the problems within the Leafs organization start from the top. Hey, where's Aki Berg?

Tonight Toronto is off to Buffalo for another kick at the Sabres McCabe and Tucker should both be in the line up and other than Colaiacovo the leafs will be at full health for the first time since two months into the post-lockout era (end of November 05) for those of you who didn't know when the lock out was...Toronto has a good chance at winning tonight (the only reason I say that is because there aren't too many teams with worse records than the Blue and White.

I wouldn't be surprised if Raycroft got the start. Toskala has been pulled twice in two games and last time Raycroft was in the Buff he played pretty well...(lost in O.T. thanks to Bryan McCabes over time heroics)
I had a little extra time at work today so I got busy with the photoshop and poked fun at the "Razor"...if you have any funny photoshop ideas let me know...Leaf fans always like rippin into over paid under performing bed-shitting sieves.

Enjoy...and I'll see you all tomorrow morning. Hopefully we'll have something to be happy about...Until then vote for week 5 pylon...(worst player from today till next Wednesday) I'm welcoming back all the injured guys so you can pick who should of stayed on the disabled list.

Peace.

Ohh wait...Big 88 retired yesterday...On behalf of all leafs fans let me say...Thank god.

Game 16: The Boys Are Back...And Stinkier Than Ever...

Many thought that with the return of Mark Bell and Kyle Wellwood the leafs could triumph to victory and put the amazingly hot Senators in their place at Scotiabank...Those same people were completely wrong.

I'll be honest, I don't even want to write about last nights game. Ottawa has completely dominated us for the past two years...Every time we play them we know they're going to be hard. We know they're going to be fast. We know everything about them yet when the puck drops the Leafs are stuck with the butts of their sticks shoved up each others asses like a College st. Congo line.

If there is any plus side to last night Mark Bell looked great and also took the liberty to make Chris Neil's face a lovely punching bag for the last few seconds of the game...Mark Bell will be a great addition to the Leafs...no doubt about it...Ohh yeah Wellwood had a forgettable performance.

What pisses me off the most is the inconsistency the have had this year. I mean if they were shit the whole time then this would be a little easier to handle but they have played a few games (and not many) this year where they looked as good as the Senators if not better. But they can't carry that type of play from night to night. I hate it...You know what? I'm done. I'll write something about the Rangers / Leafs game on Saturday
...right now I just hate the Leafs...More than Bush hates black people.

At least Toronto only has to play Ottawa 5 more times...we're almost half way there...

Games 14 & 15: Devils Are Boring And Montreal Are The Leafs Bitch Again...

This weekend the Leafs were down in New Jersey (Friday) and over in Montreal (Saturday) where they lost one and won one.

Down in New Jersey the Leafs had another extremely boring game against the Devils and fell short 3-2 thanks to Toronto's shoddy defence (Wozniewski) and Brodeur standing tall against the leafs. Toronto had held the Devils to only 9 shots through 2 periods and were maintaining a 1-1 tie...The 3rd period (where Leafs points disappear) was the same old song. Giving up a short handed goal to Madden (Leafs 4th of the season) and then letting Parise dig the puck out from in front of Toskala to make it 3-1...Sundin scored from behind the net to make it 3-2 with about 30 seconds left but it was too little too late...
There's a reason why the Devils have shit attendance...It's because they're so fucking boring to watch! God damn...I'd rather watch a CFL game then the Devils. They thought that a new building would be the answer to the attendance in New Jersey but just 3 games into the new building and attendance is back to where it was...just below the brutal line (14,523) The most frustrating thing about this game was that Toronto played very well. They only made 2 real mistakes and they led to the Devils first 2 goals. Brodeur was great again and although Toronto dominated the play for most of the game the came out with no points.

So from one side of the spectrum to the other...Friday night boring Devils hockey to Hockey Night In Canada Saturday night hockey in Montreal.

With the loss to the Devils still fresh they came out against the Habs looking like it was a playoff game...(I think it looked like a playoff game...I can't really remember what they look like) Kaberle scored 1 minute into the game on the power play and played a dominating 1st period and despite giving up a late goal to Komisarik the Leafs still felt good about going into the second with a 1-1 score.

In the second Higgins scored on a 2 man advantage to make it 2-1 MTL and Sundin put another one in from behind the net to tie it at 2's before the third. But this game seemed different...The leafs were not going to fuck this one up and you could just tell...they had this "we can lose to anyone but Montreal" kind of attitude and although they started to look a little sloppy they caught a huge break when Stajan's weak shot some how got past Huet with a buck-thirty left in the game.

Toronto held off the Habs and left "la belle Provence" with the win...Toronto's now 2-0 vs the Habs this season. so I guess that's one positive this year...

Toronto is off to Ottawa tomorrow night to face the Senators where they haven't had much luck since the lockout. It will be a good game. I'm guessing Gerber will get the start because they don't want to waste Emery on a tier two team. I honestly think Toronto will have a chance at winning this game...I'm gonna say the score will be 4-2 Toronto.

In closing I wanted to tell you that I saw the best Halloween costume last Wednesday. It was a kid wearing a Colorado Avalanche jersey with a bloody face and a neck brace...He was Steve Moore...I shit you not...So with that I'm going to give my top 5 Halloween costume ideas...feel free to use them next year.

In no order:

1) The Steve Moore with Avalanche jersey and neck brace with a bloody face

2) The Clint Malarchuk with a Sabres jersey covered in blood, goalie pads and a skate hanging from your neck (for dramatic effect)

3) The Hanson Brothers. Always a great costume when you and a group of buddies are going out...don't forget to tape your glasses, drink a lot and sucker punch a few douche bags

4) A tree with a Ferrari wrapped around it in homage to Heatley

5) The Raycroft...this can be executed by covering yourself in a huge steaming pile of shit....that's all you have to do.

Week 3 Pylon Goes To...Everyone! (Almost)

Well with the voting numbers in the hundreds (not really) I was surprised to see a 5-way tie for week 3 "pylon of the Week" so here they are as chosen by you...
McCabe, Stajan, Toskala, Gill and Kubina...which all but one (and you can guess) had me a little surprised...this group has an impressive +15 with 7 goals and 19 assists...but Take McCabe out and the line changes slightly...mostly in the +/-. +21 with 5 goals and 17 assists...so really who misses Bryan (other than Darcy Tucker)...Tucker had his PR to speak on behalf of him and she had the following to say:

LEAVE BRYAN ALONE!!!

Anyways, we'll see everyone in beautiful New Jersey tomorrow night...a few things to look forward to: 1) Bell's last game to serve in his suspension 2) McCabe is still out 3) Newly constructed Prudential Center in Newark, New Jersey...Let's see some road wins (I'm not going to hold my breath though) And this weeks pylon voting has started so get your votes in...because unlike an American vote...these all get counted.